Thursday, January 7, 2010

Touching mail. Everyone who is planning for an arranged marriage must read



Good for gals as well as guys....... who have or will be going for Arranged Marriage. Sending this to others too, so that they may understand the mentality of people who cud never find a mate for themselves, n had to finally settle for an Arranged Marriage. This is a real nice piece -

Author unknown…but well written…
Every girl's desire who go in for an arranged marriage.............

The woods were lovely dark and deep. Walking slowly beside her, in the

damp mud road, was her husband whom she barely knew. He was very

relaxed, happily watching a group of kids playing at a distance
.

Her "mehandi" was still dark and smelling fresh, reminding of the

excitements and tension 2 days back. "It can't work this way

mom...please stop this
", she kept telling her mother till the last

moment, who wouldn't listen but carry on with beautifying her. She had

been crying all night
and her make-up had to be patched up twice or

thrice to hide her awkwardly swollen face.

It was too late now. She had to get married "NOW" to the guy...The guy

whom she had seen once and talked thrice
. The guy about whom she knew

nothing at all but for his name and work
. Everything happened in a

hurry and everything was over before she could breathe again... here

was she with this guy, all alone in this hill station... how can

anybody send their daughter such a long distance with a stranger???


"Hey look at that....!!!" he shouted in excitement... she shrugged and

looked where his finger pointed...

Bright colored balloons dotted the sky. Children were jumping in joy

and he seemed to be completely absorbed into it...colors are always

exciting...but not now. She was not with her friends, not with her team

mates, not even with her parents
. This was not a 3 day tour or team

building trip. This was her life and she has been forced to start off

with this person
.

Loneliness and discomfort with this stranger was sickening...She

looked at him in wonder... does he even realize that he has married

me? Does he understand that he has to love me, protect me, care for me, a

new girl, a stranger, all his life?




The marriage morning started like a daylight nightmare for her. The

first time in life she felt she should have fallen in love and then

married somebody. Some man who she would have felt more comfortable

with, someone whom she could call by name and introduce to friends,

someone whom she could trust
. But marriage morning was obviously not

the time to think all these.

Her parents would never have said "no" if she had declared that she

was in love. But she was not emotionally attached to anybody she

met, especially guys. She was very friendly, playing, teasing, but never

had second thought for any man around her. That brought the entire

responsibility of looking for a groom on her parents' shoulders. Her

parents had had a very bad time with this entire process. They started

their groom search with unending "&" operation. The concatenation of

"Horoscope matching" & "Decent family" & "Good looking" & "Good pay" &


"same cast" & so on...
that always gave 0 output. Now after all that 8

months hunt, they were not ready to hear her "ifs" and "buts" for this

'good guy'.


She had explained to her father. She does not feel anything for this

person. He is nothing more to me than any other software

professional. Like list of names she sees in the chat rooms. Distant

and usual...Her father asked her to talk to him and even meet him and

discuss their likes and dislikes. That meeting started like the

induction programme self introduction and ended like a 3 hour

seminar. She was waiting to get away from that place.
" So did you talk

with him?"."yes"."was he polite and decent"."Yes"."Oh he got that

special flavored tri-color ice-cream...!!!".OK. All her family and

relatives discussed...She was given the chance to "understand her life

partner" and that they have understood each other "well" and she is

ready for the marriage now.


All arrangements geared up and it was 24 days after her first meeting

that she was getting married to her man... perfect match as everybody

else described. Marriage hall was full with excited people, kids got

the chance to play, ladies got the chance to wear the silk saree.The

smell of rose and jasmine filled the hall. Different poses for the

photographer and artificial smiles for the videos. The moment he had

tied the sacred thread was unexplainable vaccum in the head
. It was

over. She was his wife. Accepted by the society and law. Her proud

parents were relaxed. This was their duty they had been planning to

fulfill since she was born. All this crowd will fade away, leaving her

to explore her new world...


He pulled her hand gently to sit on the stone bench. The bench was wet

and the chillness was indeed enjoyable." So what are you thinking

about?
"... that was an unexpected ball. Should she reply? Should she be

silent? She remembered the two hour presentation she had taken last

month. Bold and confident, she kept answering all the queries with a

broad smile. Now she remained silent." Do you know honey... I was not

for this marriage too...
" Oh my God... what did I hear??? Did HE tell

that or did I think aloud? What does he mean? Didnt he like me? Was he

forced into this
? He must have noticed the quizzical look on my

face...with a gentle smile he continued..."I wanted to look for a girl

myself, buy her everything, care for her, argue with her, laugh and cry

with her, then get married to her
... Anything otherwise would be a

drama. Traditional drama and I was not for it anytime. But my love for

my work and also my stress would not give me time and mind to search

that girl...
When your parents talked to me 2 weeks before our

marriage, about your fear of getting married, to a stranger, I could

completely understand your mind. I could see myself in you and that

was the moment I decided I will marry you.
There was no time to prove

myself to you, make you trust me, everything happened in a hurry. But

there was the entire life before me, to please you, to love you, to

make you trust me. This is no less than what I had dreamt, the girl i

was waiting for, is you. Now tell me... will you love me???
" Tears came

down her cheek. Her parents had done more than their duty. They had

found her the perfect guy. Thank you Mom!!! Thank you Dad!!! His

question remained unanswered yet both knew the answer....

2 comments:

sunanda yellapragada said...

"When your parents talked to me 2 weeks before our

marriage, about your fear of getting married, to a stranger, I could

completely understand your mind. I could see myself in you and that

was the moment I decided I will marry you. There was no time to prove

myself to you, make you trust me, everything happened in a hurry. But

there was the entire life before me, to please you, to love you, to

make you trust me. This is no less than what I had dreamt, the girl i

was waiting for, is you. Now tell me... will you love me???" Tears came

down her cheek. Her parents had done more than their duty. They had

found her the perfect guy. "-------G.R.O.S.S!

I'm so sorry first,as I really don't know what rushes at that point in time(as I have never been in that stage). But, the entire poem like is so true...but the end is Eeee :D

Baggy said...

Nice one Karthik! :)